Good news! Even if everyone at work despises you, they will like your baby. Since that is the case, your co-workers will probably want to throw you a baby shower. If they’re so happy for you and the life you’re bringing into the world, of course they will be totally respectful of your wishes and desires for baby products. Yep, not so much!
If you’re like most new moms, you logged in to babiesrus.com within minutes of seeing the plus sign on your pregnancy test. You read all the reviews and from a totally self/baby-centered perspective, clicked the check box for any and everything you’d ever need. Onesies, blankets, sheets, bottles, nursing supplies, nipple cream… Standard fare right?
Think of it this way, if your IT department would flag “nipple cream” or “butt paste” as a search in Google as inappropriate, you probably shouldn’t let your co-workers know that this is on your list of must haves. Three reasons come to mind.
One. Some people, even in this modern age, are prudes just like me. I’m sweating just because the word “nipple” has already been in this post
two darn it , now three times! A Southern lady just doesn’t say words like that in mixed company.
Two. The same guys in IT who block your dirty search words, would probably revel in the fact that “nipple cream” was on your registry. Imagine their Beavis and Butthead joy when they look at your registry and snicker,”Huh-huh, that goes on boobies!” (Great! now I’ve written “boobies”!)
Third. Something is just not right about this statement. “Gee, uh…thank you Accounting for the lifetime supply of butt paste.” It’s hilarious if you’re with close friends and family but a little weird when you’re writing it on a thank you note to the people who you will give a performance review to at the end of the year.
So, my advice is if anything is snicker-worthy because of its TMI nature, keep it off the registry. Surely you’ll get an extra poop diaper sausage maker (aka Diaper Genie) that you can exchange for all the nipple and butt cream you could dream of having.
I’d be interested to hear from you about the worst gift you received at your office baby shower so start dishing!