Don’t Ask, Do Tell – When to let them know you’re expecting

When should you let your employer know that you have a baby on the way?  I’m sure there are varying opinions but in general I’d say the sooner the better.  Here are some reasons why:

  1. If you were the boss, you’d like to know.  Let’s put their shoe on your ever expanding maternity foot.  Fast forward one year and you’ve fallen in love with your nanny/child care provider.  They’re dependable, they do an excellent job and they’d be super hard to replace.  Then one day they show up and tell you that they’re taking the next three months off and you’re required to hold their job for them while they’re gone.  Huh?!?  You’d freak out!  You don’t have a back up because they’re the only one you want and you didn’t have time to make a plan.
  2. It’s going to be hard to hide.   I know, there are so many runways featuring models in stretchy panel pants these days that it’d be nearly impossible to tell that your wardrobe has changed.  And the fact you dry heave any time you smell, see or think about pencil shavings probably has gone totally undetected.  You’re not kidding anyone.
  3. You’ll feel like a jerk for lying.  Unless you’re hormones have already pushed you over the edge into “What you lookin’ at?” land.  People are going to be poking around, asking pointed questions like, “Who’s your surgeon? They look so real!  I wouldn’t have pegged you as the Pamela Anderson type.”  I mean, are you really just going to go along with it.  “Oh yes, she is one of my life mentors,” you say to skirt the subject.

I could think of several other reasons but I know your attention is so fleeting these days.  What about reasons to delay the big announcement? One big reason is that your boss isn’t very understanding and you’re afraid of her reaction.  In that case, talk with HR first so they’re on the lookout for any weirdness after you’ve let the boss know.

I’d like to hear from others so share your advice and stories of how it worked out for you.

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